The therapist has a copy of my hierarchy and exposures while I’m doing them with the therapist in the room. Now confessing is a big compulsion with this theme. Why You’re Not Sure and 7 Ways to Get a Grip. I had a drunken slight sex fumble we’re it was me doing all the fumbling and massaging. but now 4year later that guilt felling is back and i feel i need to comfuse every thing from past etc or if i for got to wash my hands , but its just that over whelming guilt felling is getin to me but for no real reason also were before ther woz a few reasons i really dont want to back to what i woz like 4year ago it woz a really bad place, . That’s ruminating and it’s pointless. Because all other topics of my OCD really got better with Exposure and Response prevention but the one we treated differently still bothers me so much and even got worse over time. No going over it vocally after that. I wasn’t sure if I touched her private part by mistake when trying to wake her up. It may not even be fair to call them mistakes — everyone does things, that although they may have wanted to in the moment, or thought it was the right thing to do, that they will eventually regret. I was wondering if there was a way to speak to you directly? For more information on OCD visit: International OCD Foundation. I struggled with this concept personally, especially in the depths of my recent bout of OCD. In fact, it will probably have 60 questions just for the hell of it. Soon enough the thoughts come back and you do more compulsions to try and feel better. My brain immediately remembers something else I did that was “cheating”. Sometimes the ‘crime’ took place recently. ty for this dave i have ocd since a woz 15 and nuffin has really hit home as much is this blog did i done lot of cbt on this theme and done the higher arky of righten down the thouts in my head ocd it help . Let it go. Is excessive guilt over past mistakes OCD, or something else? I feel like I need to confess every Little private thought or fantasy that might be considered unfaithful. You need to realize that, as always, OCD is lying to you. Your biggest compulsion is likrly ruminating, going over the incident again and agsin in your head. You’re seeking clarity where none will be found. BUT before when a done it it woz more doin the opsite like iam goin to harm this person by doin such and such . What I find so upsetting about this form of OCD is that there is only so few information on the internet. My OCD took complete hold of me recently. And the sufferer performs compulsions, most notably ruminating — going over the event in their mind repeatedly. My problem is that I’ve sctually done bad things. Saying it once is fine. Skyapple, I think if a mistake is worthy of correcting you’re going to decide very quickly, do something, and then it’s over. Hi, I understand what everyone is going through here and would really appreciate some advice! I asked myself when it first happened when would it be considered worthy enough to admit fault ? When I put it all in place now, it makes sense. Another compulsion that is not uncommon in those with obsessive-compulsive disorder is the need to confess. I can’t imagine as to how I would be dealing with this without him. That’s a compulsion too. This hurt her immensely and she is still recovering. Obsessions are unwanted, intrusive thoughts, images or urges that trigger intensely distressing feelings. It can become an endless circle. With OCD, confessing is a compulsion. Do not deny yourself medical care. Rumination, the incessant reviewing of thoughts silently running through your mind. I can't seem to get over my past mistakes, i have terrible guilt from it. From the cognitive side the person can start saying positive statements as opposed to negative, all-or-nothing-thinking statements. They’ll never lead to certainty. What if , I never plan to , I had murdered someone.. like no imagining it but full on without a doubt knowing I had. I do the rumination of past events but what i tell myself is that it is the past their is nothing i can do about it, and to move on. There was no one else passing judgment on you. For example, I might feel like something I did or thought proves that I’m a bad person, even when logically I know that it doesn’t and that I can’t control my thoughts. She moved out for a few nights or so, was very awkward initially due to breaking her trust and I know it was my fault. I would start to google and search for answers that would make me feel better. Archived. Then you try to figure it out, you analyze it, trying to see if what you did wad bad or not. In short I would say I have gone to great lengths to make amends. Like the artcal says every one can tell us its not a bad thing etc and no crime but for the suffer its fall s on death ears cose we its still wrong . No doubt ruminating is a big one with this theme. Close. Thank you, Dave. This is one very major part of my OCD that I deal with. I do hope the therapy you are starting is CBT. I recently made the mistake of telling her about a message that I sent to some girl 3 years ago inviting her to go out (nothing happened). None of them are. Thank you for this post and your response. and now all of a sudden I have this massive feeling of guilt and find myself trying to remember exactly what happened, what I did and how much of a bad person I am. I severely damaged my relationship, and almost lost a person who I love like no other. It just goes on and on. When the sudden thought popped in August 2014, I started questioning myself as to whether I did touch her private part by mistake or intentional or is it some sort of false memory. These are the types of ideas you need to take to heart. Some websites and professionals call this OCD theme something like real-life OCD, because an event did take place in real life that has become the focus of the sufferer. So feels like it’s never going to go away. I just don’t want to go to hell . Thank you Dave. . With past mistakes, are there times when you really do need to confess and make amends? In all cases sufferers with this theme become obsessed with what happened. What is wrong with me? Few things are. 3 3. With the way my OCD presents itself, the urge to “confess” my wrongdoings is my strongest compulsion. Oh yes, I sure have heard of this before. Even if you are convinced that you made a terrible, awful, unforgivable mistake, you need to realize that your OCD will bend and twist and amplify it. Now I don’t necessarily want to talk about what I obsessed over, but I will say this — they were real mistakes. And they relentlessly punish themselves over the most minor of transgressions. Many times I’ve seen people raise this type of OCD then vehemently stick to the belief that the situation has nothing to do with OCD. This is why we do not attempt to reason with OCD. This is a very typical case of Real Life OCD. We have a 2 year old boy who really keeps me going. Confession is a common compulsion which can appear in many subtypes of OCD. and any thoughts that might help. I wanted to ask you if you know where i can get more information about this form of OCD? It seems to be hard for me to be nice to my and not be hard on my self . You think you need to right these wrongs because it will make your anxiety go down. I spend every other minute repeating this in my head the last few days. Is excessive guilt over past mistakes OCD, or something else? I could be fired and go to jail if anyone knew . This is one of most read articles on the website. But sitting there thinking about it over and over is ruminating and that’s a compulsion, which you want to stay away from. I have suffered from harm ocd for the past three years. When I was younger and masturbated on different porn sites, it happened a couple of times that I watched free live cams. Just wanted to try some thing to help that progresss. The desire to set things right is overpowering but doing so usually offers no benefit. There are compulsions performed. This theme has one thing in common: the sufferer’s steadfast determination to punish themselves for the perceived transgression. It lasted for few weeks and then the thoughts would again pop up. You need to work on those compulsions, slowing them down then stopping them. ERP is part of CBT. Confession, prayer requests, and reassurance are vital parts of living a thriving life but not for every passing bad thought. It will quickly turn into a compulsion and you’ll be stuck again. That’s an interesting situation you have there. For all the misdeeds you’ve worried about, the punisher was always you. I’m 40 and never got to grips with ocd now had a massive breakdown this Xmas !! I also had gronial response to my OCD which just added to the OCD and depression. To start there are quite a few books out there about CBT. They can perform other compulsions, such as searching the Internet for stories of people who similarly screwed up, searching to find out what truly bad people do as a way of comparison, seeking reassurance and confessing. Have you heard of any people like me ? While some people may ask for reassurance that they aren’t a terrible person, some sufferers come across as if they want confirmation that they are bad and that what they did was egregious, terrible and worth punishment. There are varying degrees of transgressions, but odds are they are not unforgivable. I thought I was feeling ok and stopped seeing her – we agreed that it was all down to my anxiety and that I should try body work like massage or acupuncture. . I can’t tell if it’s just me obsessing or if I genuinely need to right these wrongs. Sleep was my only real relief. I just posted this exact message myself a few minutes ago! On the behavioral side, it is important that sufferers identify the compulsions they perform and work to resist them. Ocd guilt over past mistakes . It will always have 20 questions to ask for every answer you find. I don’t know if you fully understand , what I did was considered abuse. It may not actually be logical, in these sense that an outside observer, reading your thoughts as if they were a transcript, would be able to explain what was wrong with your thinking. The past couple of weeks have been an all time low. In these situations, how can I figure out whether a mistake – especially a recent one – really should be fixed? Thank You for this article. No, you don’t want to keep telling yourself that over and over. Seeking reassurance from others is a compulsion. I have no idea who you are and thus could not report you. I then passed blame on them and then on me back and forth. I lost my mom in May 2014 to a cardiac arrest. Or touching someone’s leg when they told a story and I cheated. That’s the nature of OCD. I like how you said, resist that urge to confess, as it feeds the OCD. Analyzing that one moment, trying to figure out if you are bad… these are compulsions. Contact Information. But, it’s depressing me greatly! You do not want to repeat that in your head. Do not confuse your inability to logic with your OCD as a rational, logical failure. It’s all a big OCD lie. I’ve suffered from this very element of OCD and I forget it is an aspect of the illness. My old therapist also didn´t really treat my “obsession” about a mistake i made in the past the way we treated my other OCD topics. Always make it worse than someone without OCD would deal with it passed away let... 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